Highschool Celebrities

Everyone knows the latest gossip about the celebs in Hollywood. Its in magazines and TV, about the completely normal things they do, and they get millons out of this. They make millions out of nothing!!! But of course, we’d never do things like that, would we?

If you said no you wouldnt, your probably lying.

We may not make millions but we do however gossip over nothing. If you think about it (sorry if you you go to a single sex school, cos then u probably cant relate) but if you think about your highschool, then your probably doing this almost everyday. Cos if your school is anything like mine, (and i know for a fact, some of them are) then the majority of your grade will be gossiping about the couples and ‘who likes who’ and shit like that. Everyone makes so big a deal about if you ‘like’ someone that now its pretty much an impossible task to keep a secret related to the topic. Once you tell someone, everyone knows. And then now that the person you like is eventually gonna find out, you figure you might as well ask them out, so if your brave (*or stupid) you do that. Everyone will find this interesting so you might as well hurry up before the crowd gets too big (assuming you didnt take the less brave less stupid less ‘romatntic’ way out and ask over msn). Whether you did or not dosnt matter, cos everyone will somehow know the answer soon enough. If they say yes, then youll probably end up doing, well, NOTHING, and break up after one or two weeks. I know that at my school, this has happened so many times, and not many lasted more than a month.(one or two actually lasted a little while. One or two out of maybe friggen fifty!!!) And say you were lucky an they said ‘no,’ then everyone will make a big deal, and for the next few MONTHS, people will say ‘oh, sorry it didnt work out’ or ‘hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, suck that ugly’ but you get the point, they wont let you forget it. In my school, once, the rejected was so sad, she litrally cried all night, whilst eating ice cream. Watching too many movies my friend… But to me, highschool (at least before year 10, or 9 even, when realitionships start to get serious) looks kinda like a mini hollywood, or a live action celebrity magazine.

Or of your not convinced its like mini hollywood, try TV dramas. I cant exactly put examples without being sued, but think about it. You know it works.

What Has The World Come To?

What has the world come to? I mean look at the people, everyones either several sizes to big or too small. The people that care about what they look like have gone too far, because female models make it out that once you’re the size of a sign post, the men will drop dead. Good god, how wrong they can be…

And the others have been surrounded by all this ‘healthy food’ that will kill you once it hits your mouth. And theyre everywhere. And theyre so cheap. Why is it that healthy food costs more than the shit from McDonalds and KFC?!

But that’s not what I want to write about.

I mean everyone knows that guys are great at maths, an girls are great at litracy, right? WRONG!!!!!!!!!!

Todays view on sexism is full of shit. I mean, everyones saying its against the rules to discriminate because of gender, and everyone is equal, but when it coms down to showing you whats really happening, its not equal at all?

How is it that if you go to a wedding, the men all are wearing the exact same thing, and the women have all these dresses, different colours sizes, shapes. But the men are all In black and white.

How is it that women can wear clothes that look exactly like mens clothes and be normal, whereas if a man wears a dress, hell be, well, and idiot?!

How come Girls can be tomboys and be straight, but boys cant be, ahhh, tom…girls… without being gay? How is it that ’guy music’, can be openly liked by gilrs, whereas, when guys listen to ‘girl music’ they are put to shame.

But Im not saying that girls aren’t discriminated either

I mean, why is it so special when a girl plays sport? I mean, it was on the news a little while ago, that some district had made a ‘girl rugby team’!!!! OHHH WOW – NO- the girls wanna play footy, big deal. And who says guys like the ‘poshy’ ones? Man, most of us wanna shoot them…

Now this is one thing a lot of girls have probably asked their parents millions of times. I might not really care about this topic but a lot of people do (guys and girls), why is it that parents are more protective when it comes to girls dating. Like the girl is pressured into not being allowed to date until NEVER (for some reason) and when the girl asks ‘what about him (her brother or someshit) The parents probably thing “nah @#$% him…

Why?

Im guessing its because guys cant get pregnant-but who am I to guess—or care?

But anyways, what do you find unfair?

PS if I got any of the girl points wrong-don’t balme me- I don’t know much about the opposite sex….

What Has The World Come To Prt 2

What has the world come to… Honestly. Justice is shit – if someone breaks into your house and falls on a knife, he can sue you, and win. Emotion has become illegal – Its against the law to become an emo in Russia. But we’ve always had Christmas to cheer us up, with the presents, and the love and Santa. But was it all a lie?! Was Santa some pornographic asshole this whole time?

 

According to the department of (something to do wit children in public) in the USA, Santa might be banned from saying his jolly ho ho ho, because ho, sounds like hoe, which means slut, and this rule might become an Australian one. But honestly, don’t you think you oughta change the name of the garden tool, hoe, in case a 3 year old starts paying it for S*X!

I mean seriously, theyre replacing it with hahaha. Now picture this scenario:

A boy sits on Santa’s lap and is asked what he wants for Christmas. The boy says a train set. Then Santa burst out laughing

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA – sure kid, ill see what I can do HAHAHAHAHAHA

The poor kid will be put down. HES BEING LAUGHED AT!!!!

My god, I mean, any kid old enough to know what a hoe is, probably wont be sitting on Santas lap without the presence of someone younger, an anyone young enough to still believe in Santa wont have any clue what a hoe is other that a sound a fat guy in a red suit is gonna make when you sit on him! An if by chance theres a little kid out there who knows what a hoe is, believes in Santa, and is younger than 7, hes had problems from the start to begin with.

 

But if you have to target Santa for something- youd think the government would target the fact that Santa is overweight! I mean, The USA and Australia are the 2 fattest countries in the world. Both having almost a third of their population overweight. And yet theyd choose to pick on the way the fatman laughs!!!! They don’t seem to have any problem at all with the fact that the man goes all around the world in one night but somehow GAINS weight!!! Someone should leave this man a SALAD!!! NOT MILK AND COOKIES!!!!!!!!!! GO ON A DIET, OR YOULL NEED A NEW SUIT!!!

OR MAYBE EVEN SEVERAL NEW REINDEER!!!!!!!!

I mean the guy shouldve realized he was fat after he noticed he weighed more than THE SACK OF THE ENTIRE WORLDS PRESENTS!!!!

I doubt the man will find any ho ho hos at the rate hes going!!!!

[Inspired and with quotes from Hamish Blake and Andy Lee]

We Hate The People

We all have things we hate – foods, smells, me…

But sometimes what you really hate is other people. They state the obvious, the state the obviously incorrect, and their just really, really annoying.

I hate it :

when your crying, clearly in pain, and People ask, omg are you alright? NO! IM CRYING IN AGONY COS IM FINE DUMBASS!!!!

When your sad, you’d prefer to be left alone, but these nosey people keep coming and asking what happened. You tell them. Then all they say is: I know how you feel… and they pat u on the back. I fail to see how that helps me… ok they know how I feel people! Its gonna be alright!!! WTF

When people say its always the last place to look. NO KIDDING. I know you’ve heard this before but I cant stress this enough! WHY THE HELL DO YOU KEEP LOOKING AFTER YOU’VE FOUND SOMETHING!!!

When people choose to go look around the entire house for the remote cos they refuse to go to the TV and press the buttons manually.

When the truth is harder to believe then the lie. Cos people believe what they want to hear. This is a true story: Im eating my sandwich on a bench, right? Then, some guy eating chicken decides to toss, but doesnt want to get caught, so he waits until the teacher turns around. Then he throws the bone as hard as he can, but not high enough, it his my in the eye, and my eyelid starts to bleed. It didn’t hurt, it wasn’t deep, but it was noticeable, very noticeable. Wtf was I gonna tell my parents-some asshole hit me in the face with a CHICKEN BONE-thatll work. As im on the bus home i remember we did basketball that day for PE and I had been hit in the face. So I said that was the cause of the cut. It worked. Cant believe it though…

When people in the cinema, yell out did u see that!! After something cool happened-NO ASSHOLE I PAID TO COME HERE AND LOOK AT THE FLOOR. And speaking of movies, I hate it when people have seen it before and tell everyone what happened. WHY CANT WE SUE THESE PEOPLE!!!

Dumb people. Sorry, but it is extremely offensive when someone your insulting dosent get the joke. Specially when your alone, cos you’re the one who has to explain it and by then its not funny. Its even worse when it’s a very bad joke. Like today some idiot comes up to me and tells me to say fat china quickly. The joke was old and predictable. So I tell him, “ok, say, @#$% OFF” really slowly. And he does it. He sits there saying it over and over and not understanding. So to test it, I tell him that if you say orange, 26 time quickly enough, it sounds like gullible. The poor idiot sat there saying and counting, over and over. Its people like this that kill all funny jokes. Face it, sitting down and explaining it kills the joke all together.

I hate people who string several random swear words together and expect it to be insulting. I mean, im yet to figure out how to @#$% up… let alone find out what a d**k c**t is…

I hate ot when dumb people try to pull a really old overused prank/trick on you. Smell the cheese? But kudos to those dumbasses that screw up a joke that is that stupid. Like we all know the joke “whats the capital of tailand? BANGCOK!! And bam, there goes your fertitlity. But alas, a group of poor idiots in my old school when around asking what the capital of china was. I dont know what wouldve been worse: Getting smashed in the groin by a big guy or getting punched in the face by a giant sized idiot for attempting to tell him what and where Hong Kong is?

I hate people who go to hungry jacks (which almost always has drinks with free refills) and pay extra for a large drinks. What freaking dumbasses. Just buy a small for less, and refill it again and again. Fags. Whats the matter? DOnt wanna loose weight by getting up and walking a few steps. I mean, nothing against those who order to take away, but some people pay for a large, and sit right next to the @#$%ing refill thing!!!!

I hate it when people try to ‘act natural’ on tape, but they end up looking more fake then ever. though i cant exactly say i hate this, cos it is very fuinny to watch….

Combovers. Its like they think were stupid. WE KNOW YOUR BALD MATE.You have to realize this. A couple strands of hair is doin little (coff nothing)to cover your bald head. Face it- We know, you know -the end

When people are asked, ‘Guess what?’, and the answer they get back is ‘what?’ THATS NOT A GUESS FATASS!!!!!

Theres a lot more things I hate about people, but right now I cant think of any, but, the question is… what do u hate about people?

[Lst Updated on: 19/1/09 ]